Tonight I had another run date with my friend Jen. I am feeling somewhat confident because of my successful run yesterday, children in tow, and having run further than I had before (YES - I KNOW I stopped in the middle for a cookie, among other things, but I am still counting it as a big success). On the other hand, I KNOW Jen will do her best to push me a little bit (I keep telling myself she does it because she loves me. Oh, AND she's paying me back for all of those post-run upper thoracic adjustments that are a tad sensitive...). She told me not to bring my watch this time (read, "You're screwed and at my mercy. MUAH-HA-HA-HA!!!"). So I'm going in blind, which is good for my brain and body because trickery is very effective for a novice runner like me. You keep checking your watch and you think, "OK far enough, I'm tired, turnaround time!", or you look and say, "Dear God - THAT'S IT!?!?! I'm going to die out here - no doubt. The slugs can have their way with my innards - I'm done." Jen is a smart cookie because she knows the brain of the desperate runner (ummmm....that would be ME), and how hard it is and how much it sucks to train when you are ridiculously out of shape (mentally and physically).
I know - for those of you who know me, I don't look out of shape. I have a really long frame on which to hang a lot of desserts, and heaven knows I've packed on more than a small country's fair share of scrumptious goodies in my day. Clothing also hides a multitude of sins (can I get an AMEN?), but truth be told I am the heaviest I've been, outside of pregnancy, in 20 years, and even if it is not a lot of weight to shed, things are settling in strange ways and places I'd like to rearrange, preferably to higher and firmer regions (arent' the gifts of motherhood such precious gifts?). I am A shape - Q-tip with eyes - but that is vastly different than being IN shape, and my body continues to remind me just HOW vastly different every time I set my size 13 running shoes on the pavement. So I am watchless, at the trailhead with Jen, and I am preparing myself for a good old fashioned mental slug-fest between the part of me that wants to get more fit and enjoy running (this half we shall heretofore call "Nut Job"), and the other half that relishes in the luxury of a fabulous nap, a sleeve of Oreos dunked in ice cold milk, and Tivo 'til my eyeballs burn (heretofore referred to as "Common Sense"). Clearly sanity lies somewhere in between. OK, it REALLY probably lies a hair closer to the "Nut Job" side, but were splitting hairs - aren't we?
I had a long overdue chat with my good friend and walking teammate Kathy today (let's give her a round of applause - it's her debut here on the blog, folks...). She just finished the Rock N' Roll Marathon here in Seattle this past Saturday. Oh yeah, and she, like Andrea and Jen, is fab Mom, PTA Goddess, business owner, the list goes on .... She is AWESOME. Even signing up for a marathon or a running event or walking event or swimming, biking, knitting, gum chewing, hula hooping, spelling bee, yo-yo-ing, reading, hot dog eating - ANY kind of event that requires you to focus your time and energy, push your limits and sanity and train your brain and body to do something even a step beyond your usual routine - makes you a rock star in my book. (I am so proud of Kathy and ALL of my family and friends who push themselves everyday, in ways I can't even imagine - far more than I could even cope with, no doubt. These people keep the "pity parties" at bay for me.) We were talking about this blog and my newbie running efforts and I found myself saying, "I am going to complete the Warrior Dash, the obstacles, and have fun, and I don't care how long it takes me. That's my goal for this thing. I will finish. Then want to put together a schedule because I'd like to do just a regular 5k run." WHAT?!?!? WHO IS THAT?!?! WHO IS SAYING THESE THINGS?!?!? Kathy. Hmph. Why does she have to be so cool and laid back and fun about just running a marathon? HELLO?!? That 26.2 freaking miles, ma'am. Oh yeah - no biggie. Seriously? Go inspire someone else, super runner. It's Andrea's fault, too. Cheering me on, laughing with me, training hard and sending me sweaty-faced post-run pics and pushing me to GO RUN! Telling me, "We can totally DO this!" Jen is laughing right now, I KNOW it. She's patting herself on the back - she's congratulating herself for "planting the seed". How dare she lend me a great book about running moms and type up a training schedule for me? (No joke. GO GET IT!! "Run Like A Mother" - it's fabulous and guaranteed to give you a chuckle while you're nursing your sore calves.) How dare she run with me and chat and encourage me and push me to run further than I've run in 20 years all the while slowing her pace to my super suave Grandpa style to keep me company? She is evil to the core I tell you - they ALL are. Friends that run. Don't let them get YOU hooked on the Kool-Aid. Alas, gentle reader, it may be too late for me.
I ran with Jen tonight, watch-free, wrestling match between Nut Job and Common Sense going on in my brain, lungs burning, legs cursing, sweat sweating. Yes, of course she pushed me. I definitely talked less tonight than last time. Knowing I would be running further tonight, I tried to conserve my energy and really, really tried to focus on a nice relaxed breathing rhythm (read "cough, gasp, suck in air, spit, wretch, exhale, repeat"). It was REALLY hard and I think I sort of found one, in spurts. Jen and I (briefly) talked about a mantra - this I am familiar with because another fabulous, super Mom, sister of my heart, Trish (another round of applause for her debut here on the blog, folks...oh and she's on vacation so she's not even around to defend herself - neener, neener!) had a "pep talk" inspirational card with her on our 60 mile walk last year. She would shout it out (if you know Trish, you know she is awesome at rallying a group and shouting with zest comes as naturally as breathing for her) and we would repeat it back to her, like a military cadence, but with a bunch of women, decked out in pink, followed by a lot of "WOOHOO!"s. Always good for another 5 miles. My mantra tonight was, "I am strong. I feel good. I can do anything." Did I believe it? Not nearly as wholeheartedly as I would have liked, but just like my husband coaching me in labor, it distracted my brain long enough to get through the painful parts and come out on the other side, knowing I could, and feeling stronger for it. No, running is not exactly like labor (I would probably rather be in labor to be honest...), but distraction and encouragment are wildly effective during both. Mantra it is. Reminds me of a favorite artist of mine, Brian Andreas. His prints are drawings and funny/emotional/thought-provoking lines from life. One of his prints is called "Affirmation" and the line on it is, "Remember to use positive affirmations. I am not a dork is not one of them."
Mantra and desperately trying to focus on some semblance of breathing carried me a long way tonight. Oh yeah - and of course Jen (she actually leapt and skipped a couple of steps because she was so excited for how far we'd run at one point tonight - I told you - this running thing is a sickness). She may poo-poo this fact but she actually might have been physically carrying me at some point tonight so it's a good thing she loves to run and is in great cardiovascular shape. This 6'5" frame dead weight is no joke people - you do not want this unconscious, gangly, sweaty mess on your hands. And I drool. The tally? 3.57 miles tonight in 39:35! 11:05 per mile and I didn't even walk one step. Further than I've run since Kelly Clarkson was born and I even did my little pseudo-sprint at the end (told you Jen was a taskmaster). I can officially Grandpa run the distace of the Warrior Dash, sans barf or loss of consciousness. This is a weight off my mind because I know I can make it, but I'd certainly like to feel a whole heck of a lot better running it the day of the event. That shouldn't be too much of a stretch, given I felt like a one-legged girl in a butt-kicking contest at many points on the trail tonight, but I know it will require more runs of at least tonight's distance. Off I go! See you on the road ;) I am strong. I feel good. I can do anything......
No comments:
Post a Comment